I am also a warrior and a heroine; and a person who has experienced being victimized and who stands strong in preventing myself and others from being a victim.
There is not a single part of me that can possibly imagine … sitting peacefully in a theatre with my kids, defenselessly enjoying a movie or concert, while a crazed person opens fire on us.
There is no part of me that can imagine… getting brutally attacked while I’m peacefully going about my law-abiding, care-giving, service filled days of helping others in need.
Don’t get me wrong, as I stated earlier… I am a teacher of inner peace, both personally and professionally… I hope for peace on earth and in men’s hearts, and I have full faith we are capable of it and will achieve it one day.
But there are facts of human nature that need to be recognized… As an expert Mental Trainer and a witness to thousands of clients’ attempts to make changes… I have seen repeated examples that hold true to all humans… One being that people don’t make significant change unless they are uncomfortable or suffering in their current circumstance.
This holds true for all humans (whether our relative or neighbor, or in groups as a community or nation), and it holds true for the unhealthy mind of an egocentric addict, perpetrator, bully, or terrorist. And, it must be recognized that their unhealthy mindset will very unlikely change in the midst of their bullying, beating, lying, stealing, or killing… It loves the power it is gaining from that experience, especially when his victims just cower at his attacks and let him feel the drug he’s addicted to… egoic power and control.
Peace does not just miraculously appear while a bully is running through the halls, or terrorizing a home, a country, or a nation. The same as peace does not just miraculously appear while an abuser continues to beat up his victim; or an addict continues to lie, steal, and manipulate.
The secret recipe for peace comes when the victim stands strong with healthy boundaries from a position of self-love, and when “tough love” is applied to the experiences of the perpetrator. Unfortunately, most loving people believe a peace-filled change will occur by nurturing, loving, and coddling the perpetrator… By continually forgiving their wrong-doing and bailing them out of the messes they create so they don’t feel uncomfortable. Most of us are unknowing enablers who sweep up the messes and coddle the unhealthy person… totally clueless that by making the perpetrator’s lives cushy, we not only encourage the unhealthy behavior to continue… But will practically guarantee it continues.
The only hope for peace, and the slight possibility of change in the mindset of the addict, perpetrator, bully, or terrorist, is to make his circumstances so uncomfortable that he personally decides to change himself (the infamous “rock bottom” needs to be reached by him). This does not come from bowing down and just trying to be peace loving and nurturing all the time (same is true whether in the home, nationwide, or globally). An unhealthy person, making unhealthy choices needs strong, enforced boundaries; and swift, strong, serious, logical consequences to their maladaptive behavior.
What I’m explaining is human nature and must be taken into consideration if any significant change for our safety is ever going to occur… in our homes, in our communities, and in our country.
In the meantime, until those in charge gain this insight and approach…
The mother in me who would run in front of a car to save my child…
The advocate in me who puts my compassion into action…
The warrior in me who has strength, skill, toughness, and stoicism…
Are all ready, willing, and able to protect my loved ones, myself, and my innocent Brothers and Sisters…
And are all going to proudly participate in her Second Amendment right to keep and bear arms with a Concealed Weapons Permit
If “Tough Love” boundaries aren’t being set by those in charge, I have no option but to protect where and when I am legally entitled.