As the end of 2012 approached, did you find yourself getting more and more depressed… overwhelmed with feeling New Year’s Blues? Did you watch others celebrating and not feel like there was anything to celebrate?
Those folks who experience sadness as the end of the year approaches are likely having conversations in their heads, like:
• “I can’t believe another year went by and I didn’t stick to my diet & lose the weight I wanted to. I’m always going to be fat!”
• “I am an awful provider, I am still financially struggling & I didn’t get the promotion I wanted.”
• “I’m no better off going into this year compared to how I went into last year; I suck at getting things done.”
• “I didn’t make the amount of money I said I would, I’ll never get it together.”
You may not have one of these exact stories, but you know which ones are haunting your mind and bringing you down. Expectations are one of happiness’ worst enemies.
Maybe you have heard this quote “Expectations Are Premeditated Resentments.” It can be so, so very confusing for us… we think (and are told) to set New Year’s Resolutions and Goals. For the untrained or unaware mind, New Year’s Resolutions and Goals are Expectations in Disguise… which can lead to sadness, frustration, anger, depression… and New Year’s Blues.
So now what? Are we not supposed to have New Year’s Resolutions or Goals? Let’s not go that far! Stagnancy wouldn’t be much better on our mental state. For peace of mind, we must find a balance between having goals and having acceptance for who and where we are. We also have to set realistic goals that we work on diligently and deliberately over time, then appreciate and accept our progress.
If you didn’t get as far as you would like on a particular goal, reflect on the self-destructive and sabotaging behaviors that stop you from achieving your goals… you know what they are, the same ones sneak into your plans all the time! Avoid New Year’s Blues going into 2014 by setting some New Year’s Resolutions and Goals that will directly address your self-sabotaging behaviors. In the New Year get a clue about why previous resolutions did not pan out and address them.